What does it mean to chase your desires? How do you even do that? What does a life chasing your desired feelings look like? This is exactly what I have been attempting to do…and here’s what I’ve learnt.
When we identify how we want to feel, as opposed to what we want to achieve or do, our perception changes. Aiming for how you want to feel is how you chase your desires.
• Write down all the ways you want to feel and select 3 or 4 of these to focus on each day.
• If you find this activity too broad and too difficult (I mean, there are just so many feelings, right, how do you pick just 3 or 4?), then try working backwards from your goals. Pick something you want to achieve and consider why you want to achieve that, how you will feel while working toward the goal, and how you will feel once you have reached your objective. From here, narrow those feelings down to 3 or 4 feelings.
I tried this with writing. I love to write, so of course I wrote this out…and I used coloured pens and wrote in a spiral to make it more fun!
There is a difference between reactive and generative feelings. One is that knee-jerk reaction I have a tendancy toward – that react first, act second thing about my personality that I have worked hard to overcome. The other are those feelings that positively light you up, that motivate and inspire you.
The four feelings I want to chase are: Confident, Vibrant, Excited, Inspired.
Feelings are stronger than thoughts. Feelings have power over us in ways that can supersede logic. Change the feelings and you change your thoughts and, as a result, how you perceive life. Change your thoughts (and perceptions) and you change your life (and how you live). Change your life and the world is inextricably changed along with you. Now that is what I call power!
I know when I am feeling down (and it doesn’t happen often, perhaps if I’ve been ill or I’m really, really tired), then I feel down on myself, on others and on the world. And I make this mean something…about myself, or others, or the world. You know, that kind of ‘the world is against me’ kind of thing. This takes place in my self-talk. When my ‘self’ is calm and strong, then my self-talk is happy and open and I can self-reflect, rather than feel defensive.
Key to chasing your desires means keeping these feelings in your consciousness so that they can help you in making decisions and taking actions. Here’s an example: If I can’t be bothered getting up early to go for a walk, I can tap into that desire to feel vibrant. Then it’s a no-brainer; I remember how good it feels to out walking and how much more energetic I feel during the day if I have walked. This makes it easier to get up. Rather than being something that I have to fight to achieve, it just becomes part of what I do.
How can you keep these feelings in the front of your consciousness?
• Set yourself reminders in your phone or email.
• Put sticky-notes up around your house.
• Team up with a buddy and text each other reminders.
• Keep a journal noting how these feelings impacted on your day.
• Write them on your bathroom mirror.
• Recite them to yourself as you eat breakfast or drive to work.
• Tell all your friends and family about them.
• Write them next to all your goals.
• Add them to your daily/weekly to-do lists.
• Chose activities that will help you feel them.
I have email reminders set for the middle of the day, and I do yoga and keep a journal and write to help me achieve these feelings. And I love that it is the feelings that I am seeking and the activity that provides this. This kind of thinking, chasing desires rather than goals, takes so much pressure off and makes life that much more enjoyable!
I wish you well in chasing your own desires.